February 08, 2005

Bush Budget 2005 - What a relief

After that scary post a couple of days ago, I'm glad to say I was wrong. George has it all under control. He's got his finger on the pulse of the nation.
First the good news.
The Bush budget requests $500 millon so the IRS can call every taxpayer to thank them for participating.
The reason that the costs for the continuing operations in Afghanistan and Iraq are not in the budget is because we're leaving.
Medicaide will be the first government agency run entirely on credit cards.
Instead of loitering in after-school programs, children will be forced to go home to play video games.
All veterans will recieve 1 coupon for a free wellness exam from the Cincinnati VA hospital.
The SEC tells the White House "cut our budget, we don't need it." Now that's some fiscal responsibility.
The price of electricity will remain at an all time low.

Even in the midst of all this joy, let us make time for some bittersweet partings.
Hubble will be replaced by an advanced telescope constructed of a makeup mirror duct taped to a digital camera.
Haliburton gets the contract to run Amtrak. Cheney is spending time communing with the ghost of Andrew Carnegie.

And although the debt will increase, the deficit will be cut in half.

Isn't that amazing. Something for everyone.

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